Thursday, September 29, 2011

The Difference between Blanche & Blanche

I don’t want realism. I want magic! Yes, yes, magic! I try to give that to people. I misrepresent things to them. I don’t tell the truth, I tell what ought to be the truth. And if that’s sinful, then let me be damned for it!

Blanche Dubois — A Streetcar Named Desire

That isn't me, that's Blanche Dubois. My name is pronounced with a french accent. Like the color white. I don't believe in telling people what they want to hear unless it's the truth. The actual truth and not what ought to be. I'll probably still be damned in the end though.

quote found on What is James Wearing and prompted me to post it.

Wednesday, September 28, 2011

A Note from Feist

Because I am a lucky girl who has some amazing people in my life, I've been listening to Feist's new album non-stop since Friday. I can't wait for it to some out so I can buy it. It's beautiful. It's music to walk too, to work too, to think too, to kiss too, to eat too, to live too.

So excited for the concert in November. SO exited. *swoons

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

Dead Sea Scrolls

For decades, scholars have debated the validity and inspiration behind what many consider the biggest archeological discovery of the 20th century. To see the Dead Sea Scrolls, one had to travel to Israel. Now, they’re available to everyone through the internet thanks to Google in a project managed by The Israel Museum, Jerusalem.

The 2000-year-old collection of 972 Hebrew, Aramaic, and Greek texts were discovered in bits and pieces between 1947 and 1956. They were put together over the decades and preserved in Israel, but digital records have been limited until now.

Google technology took 1200 megapixel photographs of the entire 5-scroll set and created an interface that would allow users to zoom in, isolate individual passages, and translate them into English. The text is indexed in Google, meaning that one can look any of the text up through search.
Here’s the introduction video to the project:

(thanks Google)

Monday, September 26, 2011

Revamp the Snack

In a recent article from the Washington Post, a total overhaul is done to the after school/work snack. Though not everything is 100% perfect (we know how I feel about low fat foods) . The thing I like about the list is the abundance of easy, simple food that is relatively healthy compared to it's more processed cousins in down the grocery aisle. Though can someone tell me how Candy can be "out" and the "In" alternative is cottage cheese? I love the stuff but that just doesn't match up in my head.

Tell me what you think of the list.

PS: I like to put cream cheese and unsweetened cherry or raspberry jam on my rice cakes. That's a nice way to switch it up with a Rice Crispies treat. Yummy!


There’s some debate over whether kids need to snack as often as they do. But kids don’t care about debates: When they get home from school, they’re ravenous and ready to eat. Here’s a week’s worth of quick and healthful snack ideas, courtesy of Marisa Moore, registered dietitian and a spokeswoman for the American Dietetic Association.

Serve any of these with low-fat milk (or low-fat chocolate milk, once in a while) or sparkling water with a citrus wedge.

1. Popcorn: Full of fiber, low in calories, nice and filling and fun to eat. Cooked on the stove top in olive oil, it’s also a source of healthful fat. Go easy on the butter and salt.
2. Apple slices and warm peanut (or almond) butter: The apple provides fiber and a bit of Vitamin C; the nut butter’s a filling protein and adds healthful fat to the mix. Make the nut butter dippable by warming it in the microwave for a few seconds.
3. Smoothie: Blend low-fat vanilla or plain yogurt (or tofu) with whatever fresh or frozen fruits you have on hand. Serve with a few whole-grain crackers.
4. Vegetables and hummus: Red-pepper strips, sliced cucumbers, carrot sticks, celery, baby tomatoes dipped in hummus.
5. Banana and pistachios: Bananas provide heart-healthy potassium. Pistachios offer fiber and healthful fats. Serve them in the shell; they’re more entertaining that way and take longer to eat.

12 o’clock and all’s wellness
Alarm about food allergies and the nation’s climbing obesity rate has prompted some schools to frown on certain foods. Here are some forbidden items, culled from documents issued by school systems across the nation, along with safer or more healthful alternatives.

Peanuts, peanut butter >> Almond butter
Birthday cakes, cupcakes >> Fresh fruit
Fruity snacks/ roll-ups >> Dried fruit
Snack crackers >> Baked, whole-grain crackers
Doughnuts, store-bought muffins >> Vegetables with low fat dip or salsa
Brownies >> Graham crackers
Toaster pastries >> Low-fat popcorn
Candy >> Low-fat cheese or cottage cheese
Rice Krispies treats >> Rice cakes
Caffeinated beverages >> 100 percent juice boxes
Soda and sports drink >> Low-or non-fat milk

Pick and Chew
Packing a lunch is perhaps the best way to ensure that your child gets a good, nutritious meal in the middle of the school day. To craft a well-balanced repast, suggests Carolyn Land Williams, a registered dietitian, mother of two and co-author of Cooking Light’s new “The Ultimate Kid-Approved Cookbook” (Oxmoor House, 2011), simply mix and match items from these six major food groups.
“Get the kids involved” in putting together their lunches, Land suggests; they’ll be more likely to actually eat what’s packed.

·Whole-grain bread, wrap or deli flat
·Whole-grain pita, either stuffed pocket-style or cut into wedges and toasted to make dippers
·Whole-grain crackers or rice cakes
·Cooked brown rice

·Lean deli-sliced lunch meat (turkey, ham, roast beef)
·Leftover rotisserie chicken
·Nut butters
·Black beans (count as vegetable and protein)

·Milk (skim or 1 percent)
·Low-fat chocolate milk (on occasion)
·Yogurt (look for one with less added sugar)
·Cheese slice
·Part-skim mozzarella sticks
·Individual Babybel cheese

·Baby carrots
·Red-pepper strips
·Cherry tomatoes
·Cucumber slices
·Broccoli florets (can be lightly steamed)
·Black beans
·Lettuce and tomato slices

·Apple or orange, cut into wedges or sectioned
·Individually packaged unsweetened applesauce, including flavored varieties

Fats and Oils:
·Nuts or nut butters
·Oil-based vinaigrette dressing
·Oil-based mayonnaise (olive or canola)

Bento Box Art

Cute as a tiny piece of sushi-- Bento Art!

Gross or great?

Friday, September 23, 2011

Dress for the Day

If you know me, you know I love dresses. More than any other thing a woman can buy to wear. My make-up is hardly there, my hair.. well... it's red right now. Shoes, I get classic things, one in black and one in brown and purses. Well... I've been using the SAME Burberry purse for the last... 6 years. I love the thing because it goes with black and brown.

I don't focus much on what I do with myself, I am who I am BUT I do buy dresses. Lots and lots of dresses. With my new red hair I had to hit the stores hard and find things that matched and complemented my green eye, ginger look. I bought 5 in the last 5 days.

Dresses are great because all you need to worry about is picking a dress. I don't have to match tops to bottoms or bottoms to tops. I just throw on a dress, put on some shoes and go. It's easy and always looks good PLUS it's as if you don't have any bottoms on at all.

My favorite dress at the moment for everyday wear is this cute little black baby doll sun dress from Urban Outfitters. I wore it almost everyday while in Maui because it was easy, didn't wrinkle and always looked good.

Yesterday, Cup of Jo had a quick little post about work dresses and I have to admit, I want them all. I don't need them. I need anymore dresses but I want them.

Check out the post and tell me what you think.

Be Creative Every Day

Today CW sent me a nice little link in my email.

 Play THIS Stickman Game and have fun!

Happy Friday my Lovelies!

Thursday, September 22, 2011

Military Dentistry

Apparently, when you are a military man this is what they do to you when you go to the dentist to have your wisdom teeth pulled.

I should have known there was something funny going on. Why else would they have a driver pick him up, take him 3 hours outside of the city to Edmonton JUST to go to the dentist. 

Very interesting indeed.  

(FYI: His nails usually aren't painted pink)

My Precious

Would you wear this ring? The Inner Message Ring?

A few years ago a Korean singer wrote a song about the sunburn mark that he found on his finger after he broke up with his girlfriend and removed a ring he had been wearing for a long time.

This is the story that inspired him to make “Inner message ring”, a ring with hidden letters on the inside. When you wear this ring, after a while, the message will imprint on the wearer’s finger. The two messages here are “marry me” and “always”.

My B*tch about Bacon

It all started YEARS ago when I saw a bacon suit for sale that smelled like bacon. Then bacon became out of control. And still is. When will it stop. I think I had my last straw with Adam on Big Brother 13. Don't get me wrong. I love bacon and I love 90210 BUT... that's a bit much for even me. Time to move on people, nothing left to see here. And don't even get me started on Bacon Fest.

There are other food trends to become obsessed with. Take donuts. Those things are everywhere. Or cute little perogies. Both very attractive, very bad for you and very good. Mind you... both of those tasty treats come with bacon as well.

Anyway, that's just how I feel about bacon right now. I love to eat it but I'm not going to wear it, sit on it, use it to light my house, put it in my cake, put it in my jam, get a desk top picture of it or put it on my bed linens.

Mustard on the other hand...

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Hug in a Cup

There isn't much that is on par with a hug...

Except maybe this.


If you’re feeling beat down and exhausted after a long week at the office, just remember it could always be worse: You could be a rare, near-blind, albino seal pup abandoned by your friends and family and left to fend for yourself!

Such was the unfortunate situation for the adorable little furball below, discovered on a beach on Tyuleniy Island, Russia while hiding under a pile of logs and waiting in vain for his mother to come feed him. Luckily, photographer Anatoly Strakhov stumbled upon the pup and the orphaned seal has since been taken into the care of a dolphinarium.

Super-Secret Recipe Revealed

Leave it to those rabble-rousers at NPR to break the story of the century. Yes, everybody’s fav hipster, Ira Glass of “This American Life” has published the original recipe for Coca-Cola after blowing up a photo of the inventor of Coke’s recipe book from 1886. Originally created by a morphine-addled Civil War soldier as an addiction cure, competitors such as Pepsi long ago figured out most of the ingredients. However, Coke’s mysterious “7X ingredient,” responsible for that distinctive bubbly burn, has never before been revealed.
See the full recipe and photo after the jump.

The recipe:
Fluid extract of Coca: 3 drams USP
Citric acid: 3 oz
Caffeine: 1 oz
Sugar: 30 (unclear quantity)
Water: 2.5 gal
Lime juice: 2 pints, 1 quart
Vanilla: 1 oz
Caramel: 1.5 oz or more for color

The secret 7X flavor (use 2 oz of flavor to 5 gals syrup):
Alcohol: 8 oz
Orange oil: 20 drops
Lemon oil: 30 drops
Nutmeg oil: 10 drops
Coriander: 5 drops
Neroli: 10 drops
Cinnamon: 10 drops

Of course, even with the recipe, “it’s impossible to fully replicate Coke’s recipe because there’s one ingredient only Coca-Cola can get: fluid extract of coca (which is coca leaves stripped of cocaine). Only one factory can process those leaves and only Coca-Cola has a special deal with the DEA that allows them to use it. So even if the secret is out, we’re still missing the Coke in our Cola,” Gizmodo reports.

Monday, September 19, 2011

From a Wise Man...

The Landscape of Our Lives
~By Bennet Wong

This entry is from In and Out of Our Own Way by The Haven’s founders, Bennet Wong and Jock McKeen.

Ben Wong co-founded The Haven with Jock McKeen

I have found that people tend to be goal-directed. They frequently wish to fix some problems in their lives, to let go of unfortunate situations, to forget unhappy relationships, to finally deal with their feelings about the past, to be able to face the future changed and unimpeded. After devoting much time and money with counsellors and other people helpers, they are often astonished to discover their demons to still be with them. For myself, I now have arrived at the belief that nothing will ever be done with, that we will never be rid of the past, and that ultimately, the essentials about ourselves will never change!

I have shifted from a belief that human experience is a linear affair from past to present to future, to a belief that each of our lives is an immutable landscape of experience. We all have our mountains of exhilaration, surrounded by our cliffs of danger and hardships. Each of us has places of contentment and placidity, like soothing lakes and gentle forests; similarly, each has deep, exciting and sometimes threatening waters as well as scary, unknown jungles. There are in everyone various parched deserts and lush, productive wetlands. Each of our landscapes is endless in the variety of appearances and experiences.

Although the choices are numerous, most people tend to limit themselves to living in only a few parts of the total possibilities. Some people are mountain people while others tend to live in their valleys. However, no matter which part of their landscape that they may find themselves, if they would look carefully in all directions, they would see that the entire landscape is always there, but in the background. What they are experiencing has only moved into the foreground. Nothing has been exterminated or altered. All that has changed has been the location of the present experience.

So, when experiencing happiness, a person should be aware that somewhere in the background still lurks an area of sadness. While experiencing joy in the foreground, despair has only been relegated to the background at that time. Some people become fixated to one location; even when they are in safe and happy circumstances, they are unable to shift the dangerous, harmful childhood experiences from their foreground into the background. Thus, such a person is anxious and depressed even when the current context would provide ideal circumstances for security and pleasure. By remaining stuck in one area of the landscape, this person has diminished the scope of experience; the landscape has become a small window of the whole larger picture. Such a narrowing and fixation is what accounts for neurosis.

If this metaphor of life is understood, it would seem that to ensure good mental health, people should be encouraged to visit all parts of their landscape to remain aware of the wide range of possibilities of experience. If they are able to remain flexible to shift readily, not having to remain rigidly in one place (as occurs in a fixed moral position), they will be able to stay attuned to present circumstances. That would be a sign of good mental health.

Such a metaphor begs the consideration of another set of dynamics. What if the person were unable to sustain a portion of the landscape for a reasonable length of time? Such would be the case in people who experience sudden shifts and wide ranges of movement. Foreground and background are unable to remain stable. The person would experience severe dislocation, unable to have a stable sense of identification. They would be described by outside observers as being all over the map. The sustainability of foreground is another sign of good mental health.

Now that I have this picture of mental health, I no longer waste energy trying to fix anything. I now more focus on helping myself and other people to more easily move through our personal landscapes.

Sunday, September 18, 2011

MOM: Mountain Man

I haven't done a Music Obsession Monday in... years maybe.

I have a reason now. A beautiful reason. The reason is Mountain Man.

Friday, September 16, 2011


My GF Kimberly Galbaransngh auditioned today for Canada's Got Talent. She most certinally does:

I am so proud and inspired by her just for getting out there and doing this.

We'll find out if she's made it to the next level on September 30th.

I can't wait that long.

Thursday, September 15, 2011

Becoming Ginger

Last night, I took the plung... I said farwell to summer and my lovely blonde highlights (I loved it this time, my stylist did such a good job) and hello to RED. Fire Engine RED.

what was I thinking!!

I haven't taken a decent picture of myself  but I can tell you exactly the color it turned out to be:

It's red. And I cut it so it's about this length too.

OK, that one picture, the one of me... it looks really red. haha. Ohmy!

This is a big date week as well so I will put the boys to the test! If they don't like me because I now have ginger hair then I don't like them either!


PS: Apparently it makes my eyes look REALLY green. OoOooOo...

Wednesday, September 14, 2011

Cute Car

If hybrids entice you with their environmental assets but don’t get your lead foot excited, Peugeot may one day have a hybrid that fits your needs.

The French car makers recently unveiled the HX-1 concept car, which the company claims to be the world’s first diesel hybrid. The designers at Peugeot got creative with this plug-in hot rod as a 2.4L turbocharged diesel engine powers the front wheels with 204hp while an electric motor powers the rear wheels. Peugeot claims the innovative design cranks out an impressive 299 horsepower while still allowing for an equivalent 88.1 miles per gallon.

The HX-1 is still in the concept phase so keep an eye out for further info and keep your Prius pedal off the metal in the meantime.

and to top it off, it's kind of sexy.


I took some lessons in June with a Prius, it made me laugh and screwed me up when all I had to do was press a button to turn the car on.

A few years ago when I went to Montreal with JS, we had a Prius. We called it The Space Car because it looked and sounded like one especially being that at home JS had a Land Rover LR3 (I loved Larry the LR3). I'll never forget... I remember we had parked it in Old Montreal and either it was the fact that it was parked on the side walk or because it was a Prius and looked like a space craft, people stopped and stared. Maybe it was just Quebec.

Good times.

Monday, September 12, 2011

Knowing Uncle Peter

The first thing I think I can remember about my Dad was that he had built boats for us. They were little wooden boats that he’d sawed out of pieces of wood and they had paddlewheels that were powered by elastic bands. You could wind the paddlewheel up and then put one in the bathtub and it would sail around under its own power and I thought it was the most amazing thing.

My Dad loved the water. He taught my brother and sister and I to waterski, although he was the only one who ever got the hang of the slalom ski. He owned boats and spent as many weekends as he could fishing at Dinosaur Lake. As a boy, with his brother Michael, he hopped on an ice flow on the shore of the St. Laurence, to ride it downriver, and was swept out far from shore, only making it back when a larger iceflow pushed him close enough to allow him to dive off and wade to shore before the current carried him out to sea. This didn’t discourage him though and in the summer he decided to try riding a log on the Jaques Cartier river, this time being swept off upside down through the rapids when the log rolled. Luckily, a nearby logger saw him, dove in and pulled him to shore. My Dad found this funny.

He was born in Montreal, which forever tainted his choice of sports teams, was raised in Donnacona and did some of his schooling in Ottawa. After school he followed his sister Libby west and, in 1963, he joined Pacific 66 in Taylor, BC, working at the refinery that his older brother, Kevin, had designed. He went there expecting to work in the yard, pulling wrenches, but wound up hired in finance where, in spite of having no training or experience, he excelled, as he always seemed to do. For a long time I had no idea what it was that he did for a living. He could fix things, like our car or my bike, and he taught us how to do things, like skate and ski. And then he put on a suit and went to work and did something. He never sat still for long.

The first time he tried to teach me to ski, he took me to the hill and told me to take my skiis, hike a little way up, and wait for him there. Then, optimistically, he bought himself a lift ticket and rode to the top of the hill, thinking he’d ski down to meet me, so he could get a few runs in over the course of the day. I hiked a little way up the hill, put my skis on and, not seeing him yet, decided I must have missed him and should ski down to look for him. As soon as I started down I realized that I didn’t know how to stop or turn, so I panicked and sat down, sending myself rolling end over end to a stop at the bottom of the hill. That was where my Dad found me, being put in a splint by the ski patrol. He didn’t get any runs in that day.

He was always looking for some new challenge or adventure. He worked but he was also a volunteer fireman. He helped to build the local ski hill. He coached the baseball team that my brother Paul and I played on. When my Uncle Mike built his house in Lac Des Arc, he was out there helping with that. Whatever it was that needed doing, he always seemed to know how.

Pacific 66 was bought by Petro Canada and then, in 1991, the refinery was sold to Westcoast Energy. Dad was asked to stay and help with the transition, and was the last Petro Canada employee to leave after the buyout. He tried retirement for a while but couldn’t sit still for long. He sold his house and bought a roadside cafĂ© in the Okanagan, switching from Finance to short order cook without hesitation, always ready to work. When he told me what he was going to do, I thought it was terrifying, but risks never seemed to bother him and so he went.
He loved music – learning an appreciation for opera and classical symphonies from his mother, and acquiring an appreciation for 80s rock from his children.  He also loved animals – which, if you didn’t know him well, might come as a surprise.  He always seemed to have a dog a cat or a bird, or some combination of those, close to him.

He moved back up north in 2003, settling in Dawson Creek with his cat, Salem, where he could be close to Peta and Paul and their families.

He always seemed incredibly large and fearless to me, always able to do whatever needed to be done.  When I learned he was sick with pneumonia it was a small worry.  He was 71 so being sick seemed serious, but then, he never got sick in spite of everything he did, so it seemed impossible that anything could actually hurt him.  When we learned that there were shadows on his lung and liver x-rays, I seemed to get confused – I had a hard time keeping track of what day it was; I got lost in the parkade at work and wandered around not able to understand why my car wasn’t there.

Almost as soon as we knew it was cancer, he was gone.  I guess this is probably better, to go quickly.  But I miss him.  He never said much, which could be difficult for us at times, but when he smiled you knew he liked your company.  He could make you feel wanted without saying it.  This is the way he was.

He wouldn’t have wanted today to be a sad occasion.  He would want to see people enjoying themselves and remembering him as the person he was – full of life and humour.  So I’d like to thank all of you for coming today, to celebrate his life and his impact on ours.  Thank you.


this is the eulogy from my Uncle Peters funeral. Written and read by his son, Peter. I didn't know my uncle very well. I didn't know that he was 71 years old when he passed away, I thought he was older than my Dad. My Dad is now the oldest living sibling of that family. My mum keeps him healthy and strong. She keeps the both of them healthy and strong. After reading the eulogy, I, for the first time, felt as though I actually knew who Uncle Peter was. It was a nice glimpse at the man his son saw.

Cave of Forgotten Dreams

A few weeks ago I went to a movie with my friend CW. We picked a documentary called Cave of Forgotten Dreams (it's nice to have someone to go see documentaries with, they are a rare breed) which was playing at the flea pit in Eau Claire.

It was a remarkable explanation and introduction of the Chauvet Cave in southern France which I never knew existed till seeing this film. Spellbinding. Beautiful and mysterious.

I don't want to share too much because I don't want to ruin your experience when you see it-- which I think you must. 32,000 years is a long time ago and you'll be mesmerized by the discoveries. I've been thinking and talking about it for over a week now. Well over a week.

Moon Cakes

The Chineses mid-autumn festival is going on right now, today being the most important day because of the full moon. I was talking with one of my co-workers whose weekend was filled with mid-autumn festivities and I asked her about moon cakes and where to find the best ones in the city. After she got over her surprise that I knew what they were, she told me that moon cakes were very expensive and they averaged at $40 for a box of 4. These little cakes are typically the size of my hand or a small meat pie. Now it was my turn to get over the shock. $40 for 4 little cakes filled with egg yolk or fig. Though considered a delicacy, I was still shocked at the price. I think back to my first introduction to them when I was 12 years old and I understand why I was only given a portion. Expensive and not to be wasted on the fickle taste buds of a sheltered, upper-middle class white girl. True story. This friend was also only friends with me because she thought I was pretty. Ahhh... to be young again!

Yaden at work told me that tomorrow the moon cakes will be better priced. Perhaps I'll have to seek them out tomorrow. Mmmmm...

By the way, I was also told that the best lace to find Moon cakes is that the TNT Asian markey in north calgary though I had to admit, I have seen them in some of the bakeries in downtown China Town. Or I suppose, you can always make your own. Mmmm... it's time for breakfast.

Phrases We Owe to Shakespeare

borrowed from English Muse...

Becky, a 20-year-old English Lit geek living in London, scribbled out this list in a Moleskine notebook at 3 am a couple nights ago. She posted it on her Tumblr page, and within 24 hours, more than 11,000 people had saved it in their favorites file. She was astonished. “I still don’t know how something I scribbled in a hurry at 3am got so many notes in the space of a day? Shakespeare is clearly too awesome,” Becky said in an update on the post today. “I spelt “bated” wrong, awk … Someone said this looks like a serial killer’s notebook, which made me laugh a lot. They’re not wrong, I’ve been a sleep deprived zombie lately.”

She certainly is a girl on a mission.

On her birthday on August 30th, she set a challenge for herself: Read a book every week until she turns 21. “Lately, I’ve gotten into the terrible habit of buying books but never reading them. Gradually I’ve been reading less and less,” she said. She put together a list of 52 books (heavy on Palahniuk, Murakami and Hemingway) and posted it here. “I thought it would be a good way to encourage others to read more too.”

Want to take the challenge? The details are here. She’s also giving away the books she reads. Awesome.


As someone who had read a lot in my life time, I can relate to the lack of reading as one gets older. I used to go through books in a week and now I go through a book in a month or more. Life takes way and I start to put other things ahead of it. That's changed recently and I'm glad. I am ever more inspired by the list and though I don't really think I have time to read a different book a week for the next year, I can read some of these.

Friday, September 9, 2011

Nike MAG

They say good things come to those who wait. Well, we’ve waited 22 long years to finally get what we desire…Marty McFly’s shoes from Back to the Future 2!

As any young’un from that generation remembers, those were the shoes that filled our dreams. Ever since Marty first slipped those Nike MAGs on in 2015 Hill Valley and they magically fit themselves to the perfect size, we knew they would the end-all, be-all of playground bragging rights if we could ever get our hands on them.

Nike is finally making the dreams of a lucky few come true with the very limited release of 1500 pairs of precise replicas of Marty’s Nike MAGs. Starting today, 150 pairs will be auctioned off each day for the next 10 days on Ebay, with all net proceeds benefitting the Michael J. Fox Foundation For Parkinson’s Research.

The first pair was auctioned off in Los Angeles Thursday night for $37,500, so be ready to shell out some cash to get yourself a pair of the sweetest kicks ever.


Holy Crap,

Have I been busy.

Everything happeneing at once.

I'll write soon, just not now.


Love you.

Friday, September 2, 2011

The Libertine

What is it with me and boys with romantic notions of travel? It's as if they can hear my quiet little heart song and the grab on to it and tell me exactly what I want to hear, telling me exactly what it is I see in my dreams.

I can't just quit my job, pack up and leave and head to California, Aruba and Chile for a year.

At least not in October.

January maybe.

I'm prepaird for big changes in January, I've been getting ready all year.

Big Boy Mac-n-Cheese

About 5 years ago Mac-n-Cheese was a huge trend. I tried it in a few places and got sick of it really fast. It's just always missing something and now  think I know what it is. It's missing meat. I found this recipe on one of my Internet journeys and thinks is sounds creative enough to be actually be good.

Big Boy Mac-N-Cheese from Hole-in-the-Wall Smokehouse BBQ at Pointe Hilton Squaw Peak.

1 cup beer
2 cups heavy cream
1 tbsp chopped garlic
2 cups grated medium cheddar cheese
3 cups cooked elbow pasta
½ cup cooked and chopped bacon
Salt and pepper to taste

Bring beer to a simmer. Add chopped garlic and simmer for 2-3 minutes. Add heavy cream and let it simmer again. Add pasta. Let pasta cook for 1-2 minutes, then add cheese. Melt together for 3-4 minutes, then add bacon bits. Remove from heat and season to taste. Serve immediately.

Uncle Peter

When you have a family large enough there is always someone to take on particular roles. There's the smart one, the dependable one, the impulsive one, the reclusive one, and there is always a drunk and wild one.

Uncle Chris passed away long before I was born. He was the wild and drunk one.

Uncle Jimmy moved out to Trinidad and now the biggest part of my family is out there living in the Port of Spain. He was the impulsive one.

Uncle Mike has stayed in Calgary the whole time, had a family, done well in Oil and Gas. He was the dependable one.

My dad, the second youngest, graduated with a degree in chemical engineering at the age of 18. He has an IQ of 160. He is the smart one.

Uncle Peter, he was married twice, both of the wives he didn't talk too. Both of his children stopped talking to him and he lived in a house in norther BC until he went to the doctor a week ago. He was diagnosed with cancer and passed away 2 days later. He was the reclusive on. A hermit.

My dad didn't know him very well because he never let people know him. It doesn't make his passing any less sad. And less sudden. I actually think it makes it sadder. I only met him twice, in 2007 when we had a family reunion. Even then he spent most of his time drinking and smoking. But he still came, so he liked to be around people. I liked him despite his off-put nature.

I feel for my dad as he no longer has his 3 older siblings. Just Uncle Mike, the youngest of all 5 boys and even my father is healthier than him. 

This kind of thing just refreshes in my mind the desire to look after myself and continue to forge connections with my family.  Everyone did the best they could with Uncle Peter and in the end, we are the only ones left to think about our past decisions. I know my dads feels as though he did the best he could with what he had.

Love your family. Forgive. Move on.

RIP Uncle Peter
1922  -2011