Punk Rock Tuesday

I'm sitting at The Ship waiting for Punk Rock Bingo. I have leggings on and a weird jersey shirt I bought in Montreal 10 years ago. I'm wearing it because it covers my butt because the leggings leave nothing to the imagination and should be exclusively for the gym. I have gym hair from my sweaty weight training session after work and yesterday a bird pooped on my head. Today was a no wash hair day. I look questionable and the guy sitting in the corner with the " I love hamburgers" t-shirt is trying to get my attention. It's Tuesday and I'm at the pub drinking alone, writing a blog post and waiting for my ex (who is really more of an awesome friend even after a 4 year relationship that ended a little messy for him).

I'm looking at the prizes as they are put up. I want the storm trooper helmet. This is like the adult version of Kid Street. Maybe I want the mini piano instead.

Food's here, I better eat.

What Would You Do?

So, what would you do if your found this:

a bottle, with a note and two $50.00 bills in it.

 

 

 

You open the note and it reads:

 

 

and then you unfold more, it reads this:

 

What would you do with the  money?

 

 

Please leave comments below

Me and My Low FODMAP Diet

History:
I have tummy issues. They have come and gone most of my double number life. My body just all of the sudden gives out on me. One day, things are beautiful and fine and I can eat like a wild animal and then the next day, it seems that even the simplest things will not stay in me for longer then 15 minutes. I have found ways to improve it but sadly (for me) it always comes back. I have been to the doctor most of my adult life with this. The first time, I was diagnosed with IBS by my family doctor and told to eat a diet rich in fiber, fruit and veggies. I did and it made me so sick, it almost made matters worse. It came and went for a while along with other things and then 2 years ago it got really bad and I dropped down to 78 lbs (I was usually 95 lbs at that time). I went to the hospital and saw some specialists and again, I was diagnosed with IBS. They told me to eat a diet rich in fiber and veggies but what I realised was a diet rich in white bread, processed cheese and meat made me feel best. I learned that rich food and processed food didn't bother my tummy and I finally was comfortable with my tummy and knew how to handle it. Then, one day I had some mango (or maybe it was the scone) and my tummy once again gave out on me. Nothing would help it. The things that I could eat the week before all of the sudden upset things immensely. I started to panic. I didn't want to lose weight. I have finally broken 100lbs, I go to the gym 3 or 4 times a week and do yoga, cardo and a lot of weight training. my body is the strongest it has ever been and the idea of losing that scared me. I started to panic.

My tummy issues triggered my OCD and the OCD started triggering other things and all that made my tummy worse and so on and so forth.

I felt like I was at the end of my rope. To me, it seemed like I had been down this road once before. I thought I had exhausted every option the last time. I thought I had fixed it all. Apparently not... nothing worked. I was going from bathroom to bathroom when out in public, trying hard to juggle my social life and my tummy. I was drinking Pepto every other day to try and give myself some kind of control. Everything except bagels and milk were upsetting my tummy (oh, and of course wine was fine as well), my life was feeling small and I had no idea what to do.

Currently:
Last weekend I ate some food that upset my tummy and I spent a lot of time on Monday in the ladies room at work. I figured it might be time I go on a diet for long term tummy issues. I had written about the BRAT diet a few years ago and it was helping me a little then just to normalise things. BRAT stands for Banana, Rice, Applesauce, Toast (not very nourishing for the ol' body if you ask me). I then remembered what I had dismissed most of my life, the IBS. I Googled "IBS Diet" and found something called the Low FODMAP Diet. It fit for me and so I started to research how to make this happen in my life. I know enough about nutrition and my body to follow something like this correctly and to be honest, anything is better then milk and plan bagels.

I talked to people, I did some reading and on Saturday I started (Friday, I again spent most of the day going back and forth to the washroom). It was amazing how I just all of the sudden was fine. Things were working normally and I felt like for the first time in a few month I was eating normally again. This part of the diet is only 6-8 weeks long, it's the elimination part of the diet and maybe the most challenging. By the end of the 6-8 weeks I will be able to start introducing my favorite foods again. That will be a test period to see, what do I have issues with and what do I not. The first category I will add will be lactose. I doubt I have an issue with it because I have been consuming it without any connection to issues my whole life. I want to make sure though, so I am making sure to follow the rules perfectly.

I enjoy Tweeting about it once a day as well, I see this as a great food adventure for me. Going into it I wasn't sure I could do it but having stuck with it for 3 days I realise that it just takes some thought and planning. It's not REALLY that limiting. I have enjoyed cooking (so far) for myself. I am curious to eat and enjoying not having issues. Tonight I made these quinoa cheese bacon tomato things. I had to leave somethings out of it but I make up for it in other areas. They are so good and perfect for an easy, lazy breakfast in the morning.

So this has been my Low FODMAP diet this far. It's been good and I am pleased 4 days into it how good I feel. I stopped trusting my body which is the worst thing because it's like not trusting a loved one. I didn't trust the diet going into it but after 4 days, I am learning to and even better-- I am learning to trust my body again.

It's nice to be back on the same side old friend.

Neil

I love looking at these old photo's of these old legends.

Mr. D and His Birthday

I'm doing the last thing I should be doing right now. It's a friend of mines birthday today, thanks to Facebook for telling me. He's one person I often wonder about; wonder if he's happy. I understand that it's not my responsibility to make everyone happy in life but I still think I have some ability to make things better.

 

I like company and I like people. But I also need my space. I tend to project my own fears on others and imagine that this might be what they are going through-- that could be or it more than likely may not be.

 

 

He posted a status update about an hour ago that he was heading out for a birthday drink tonight and wondered if anyone wanted to join him. I wanted to join him. I haven't sat and talked with him in years, if ever. I say hi to him when I run into him at art openings and garden shows. Always quick encounters along the journey pathway.

There are some people who post things about needing someone to go with them for this or that and I never have the desire to go. This is different. I want to do this but I look at the time and I know I have to drive to where he is. I know that I can't drink at all and drive home regardless of mental state (there's a zero tolerance for my drivers licence category for the first two years-- the two years is over this July) and my mind and judgment says don't.

 

and I think that this judgement is wrong. I look at the time again and my judgment kicks in. *sigh

 

So I make an agreement with myself to make an effort to ask him to go for a glass of wine sometimes soon and that sooths my guilt a bit. If guilt is even the right word.

 

I want to make change in my life (I always want to generate change) and I feel very strongly about people. Those two things promote wanting to volunteer more and talk to people I don't normally talk to and that movie Sliding Doors flashes in my mind. I imagine my other self driving to the north part of the city to see him and I imagine that only good things will happen from it. Yet, I still sit here. Writing a blog post about the things I want to do and making a situation not about me, about me even though my intention is just to surprise a friend I am fond of.

 

and so I reconfirm that agreement I made with myself to make the effort to go for a glass of wine with him on a different day and in my typical awkward way, I'll tell him too much about the reason why. That's OK though, most people don't mind the honesty.

 

"Hi Mr. D, I saw your status on your birthday about meeting for a glass of wine and I wasn't able to make it then but how about now? I can meet you at DeVille by your place" then I'll just walk home from there. It's almost summer and the days are getting longer. And we'll have a conversation and I will learn more about him because that would be nice.

 

 

(while I was writing this, a song arrived in my head and though I couldn't find a link for it you could look it up: Kathryn Calder --  Low  it's pretty and sweet and a little sad)

Candy Dish

I have a candy dish on my desk. It's filled with candy (fancy that!) and the original intention was to make it inviting for people to come into my lair office and be my friend. Well, I have learnt a few things...

Covered Candy Dishes are Lame:
Mine is a stuffy Waterford Candy dish which is special because I find fussy cut crystal to be special. I got it from my years of working in high end jewelery and gift ware. We used to get stuff for free all the time. Also, the candies still get stale. *sad face

No One Likes Salt Water Taffy Except for Me:
Truth! I love the stuff and I ate so much of it that it gave me a headache (over use of jaw muscles-- TMJ) and I thought it was from the weather and the florescent lights but really it was from eating too much candy.

No One Likes the New Girl:
It's true, people are often not too keen on the new person and the people in my group are like the cool kids in high school (I don't fit in and I don't care but sometimes I make it weird and I don't mean too) and so it's been hard. Plus I came from a smaller office that I had been at for 5 years so, I had family. I have friends at my new job that aren't just the food vendors in the food court but they aren't really in my department.

Location! Location! Location!:
My office is in some side hallway in some weird area of the floor with a one other person and then a bunch of empty offices. I am hallways and a kitchen away from my group and so it makes it hard. I could have naked girls and champagne and people wouldn't have the foggiest idea I was here until the naked girls left as well.

So yes, that was the intention behind the candy dish. I've had candy in it for about a month and a half. I have stopped eating it myself so I won't get headaches anymore (I can't stop at one) and since I hardly have visitor, you would think it would stay the same.

It's not.

Candy is missing.

So either people are coming into my office when I'm not here and eating it because it's awesome and they don't want anything to do with me (not true, they love me... they just don't know it yet).

OR

The cleaning staff is eating it.

In that case, they can eat it all and get a headache and then I'll replace it with chocolate and HIDE it because I don't need to pay people in candy to be my friend.

The END! Byeeee!

How To Write a Blog Post

I think I have forgotten how to write... I haven't blogged in so long and I think I have forgotten how to do it.

Test. Test-test. *ahem

Step One: Pick Something to Write About
Ummm... I can't think of what to write about. I used to just spill my guts out in here and write pretty little things about this or that and the flow of word to finger tip was never tapped out. I'm out of practice. I guess I am writing about that.

Step Two: Write About It
Damn it, I thought I already did! Sadly, it doesn't seem that I can outsmart myself in this thing.

Step Three: Spell Check and Proof Read What You Have Written
I usually skip this or at least let Blogger just check my spelling (half the time it doesn't work for whatever reason-- seriously).

Step Four: Find a Picture that Reflects What You Have Written

Perfect!


Step Five: Preview
I do this to make sure my pictures are the proper size and sometimes I find it easier to proof read in the preview format. Don't ask, just go with it! OH WAIT-- also, this might be the place you want to add your labels. This is where I decided to add my labels today. I choose NONE!

Step Six: POST IT!
Byeeeeee!

Step Seven: Edit Again
Becasue you didn't actually follow Step Five
Damn it.

Bringing Blogging Back

 

 

 

That's right, I'm bringing it back for the umpteenth time. The sad truth is this might be a fickle attempt but no one really notices. I'm pretty sure the only people who read my thoughts these days are spam-bots and ex-boyfriends. I am grateful to the ex's because they are real people that actually distantly curious about me.

 

It's January, my birthday has passed... am I getting old enough now not to care? I still know my age but yesterday I wasn't sure what year it was. I was ahead of myself thinking it was 2014. I haven't made my yearly goals yet. I have a new job (that's a major reason why I haven't been writing, I have actually been working) doing something I love for a company that is fresh, progressive and exciting (though I might still be in the honeymoon stage). I have a decent grasp on my life as well, or perhaps I am choosing what battles to fight and which ones to worry about. And maybe, I have a grasp on boys. Maybe. Really, right now... I don't really care about boys (shocker!). I think that almost all of my relationships are healthy ones-- that's a lovely feeling.

 

I think the biggest thing is now, I want to travel. My new company is more flexible with time and I have lots of holiday time. This year should be the year that I shock myself and do something amazing. I have the ability, I'm just scared. I need someone else to commit to something for me and then I'll be down. It's making that choice though, so difficult.

 

I want to do some crafts-- a little creating. Find a new passion perhaps, and keep working on the ones I have.

 

Things have been good, even in the last 6 months of chaos and uncertainty. I dealt with losing my job like a champ. I was without work for a total of almost 3 weeks. I have nothing to complain about and though that feels fantastic in my head, heart and body... it makes for awful writing. I am motivated by the fireworks and angst to write and pour my soul out. No one wants to read peppy meanderings of joy. Mind you, since when have I ever written this for other people. Mostly, I write this for me. This blog has changed face so much in the years it has been around. I guess a little like me, it's always been the same but it's just evolved.

 

I'm hungry, I should find something to put in my mouth hole.

 

PS: the title has nothing to do with another blog "I'm Bringing Blogging Back"

4 Easy Peasy Appies

 

 

 

 

OK, I should be working but I took my first real mental break from the new job to check my Shaw Webmail account. That email address is where all my junk and spam goes. I love it, my routine is to go through each email and real about everything happening and going on in the world. Travel deals, stuff happening in the city, other peoples blogs. It's a plethora of info and none of it goes to my phone.

 

I came across this fantastic 4 story gallery from Refinery 29 of simple appies that you can make... you need to check this shit out because it looks SO easy but will be SO impressive.

 

Herbed Shortbread anyone? How about encrusted goat cheese balls. OH--- party time you are calling my name!

Promiscuous

I was reading the headlines and saw this:

"HPV shots don't make girls promiscuous, according to a new study: http://t.co/ZT7doW8G"

Really? This is news worthy news? I suppose it could be a concern similar to those around birth control but...

I really don't see how a vaccine can "make" a girl promiscuous. It's unhealthy self esteem and sexual awareness that fuels a girls inability to make strong sexual choices. I pride myself in having a pretty healthy idea about sex. I'm liberal with discrimination. I've had sex on the first date and I've waited months before getting physically intimate. I gage it all in how I feel about the person and about myself. Sometimes there has been talks and sometimes it's all just happened so fast in a fit of passion. I've dated boys who I've never slept with. 

All in all, it has very little to do with anything except how we think and feel in life. It's silly in my mind to worry about a vaccine, sex education or a pill making "young girls more sexual". I think it's vital to expect that they will eventually have sex and to educate them emotionally to make good choices according to them-- not according to anyone else. 

And that's my rant from my phone this morning! 

Change Not Coins

 

 

 

 

There are events that occur in our lives that make no sense and we ask ourselves in the morning and we brush our teeth "what has this happened to me?"

 

There are events that occur in our lives that make all those little nonsensical things make sense finally, many months or even years later.

 

This has been one of those times, one of those events. Actually a collection of events that just flipped my life upside down like I try to do so carefully on my own.

 

I lost my job. I lost my love life. I felt kind of lost. The beauty of it was the boy happened a few days before the job so the job loss over shadowed everything. Plus, I have SUCH an amazing network of friends that I didn't have a chance to even question myself. This all happened two weeks ago and in some weird, wonderful way... life has picked me up and dusted me off so carefully, I almost might believe that there is a higher power.

 

Everything suddenly makes sense again. This is what usually happens in October. Things of uncertainty come to closure for the winter.

 

I have a new job starting next week, it's something I have wanted to try for many years so I'm excited to begin. The company is different from my last and I'm really looking forward to new challenges and lessons.

 

And as for my love life, I'm not worried about that right now. I'm trying new things, saying yes to situations I normally wouldn't and just allowing for different to come into my life. It's nice to have this moment of satisfaction because i know that soon, things will start to get challenging in one way or another so I'm not ready yet but... I will be. Things just happen as they should and I am so grateful for everyone who has been so supportive through everything.

 

I have been selfish and at times weird. I took a week and didn't want to socialise (not like me), I flaked out on plans and just listened to my gut. And as it does, it changed and the adventures started to filter through. So many beautiful, happy memories have come from these few weeks.

 

And for the first time I honestly believe I deserve all of this. I am confident that I will do my best at my new job, I have a heavy track record of it... I know I am capable of doing my best. I also believe that I deserve all these amazing people in my life, I am touched by their love and compassion... and I would do anything for them and they have proven they would do the same.

 

LOVE!!! xxoo

A Good Time with No Strings Attached

I went to a screener of For a Good Time, Call.... last night and I loved it. It was fresh, it was funny, it was bubble gum pink mixed with zombie strippers (minus the zombies). It was Bridesmaid's reduced. It was a dirty talking girlfriends and sex toy parties. It was a movie that was filmed in 16 days and you can't tell one bit. Simply perfect like confetti cupcakes and butter cream icing with sugar skull candies.

 

It's spanks as a date rape preventive.

 

It's 1-800-mmmHmmm

 

It's Snow White meets Barbarella and they become besties.

 

It's Justin Long, Kevin Smith and Seth Rogan all smashed in one.

 

It's sweet but with edge. This is a movie to bring your girlfriends too, maybe your guy friends (they'll enjoy the vulgar, sexy conversations) and perhaps your progressive, independent mom if you have that kind of an adult friendship with her. Don't bring your kids though (side note, I'm sick of people bringing babies and kids to movies that aren't meant for kids)- that's a no-no for sure.

 

Check you what Calgay's FFWD had to say about it.

 

It's girls being real, girls being funny and girls being awesome. If you have no qualms about sexy talk and sass then I think you might like it. It made my night but then I went into thinking it was going to be an awful movie that was filmed in 16 days that might make me roll my eyes out of pure classlessness.

 

I was wrong. It's fab. Its a good time with no strings attached.

 

and that's my cheese review of the day. xxoo

 

What I Plan to Do This Winter

Friggin' CUTE!!

 

While gloves and socks are made to be forever together, often they choose to divorce and spend their lives in a solitude.

 

Of course, we have to respect their decision, but it’s hard to look at them being all lonely, laying somewhere in the backs of a drawers.

 

Luckily, crafter and author Miyako Kanamori has a wonderful solution! With some plastic surgery you can turn your old and lonely glove into an ever happy chipmunk!

 

In her book, Happy Gloves: Charming Softy Friends Made from Colorful Gloves, Kanamori also gives complete instructions on how to make a frog, duck, flower, car, donkey, tiger, and more!

 

 

 

Fire Fly Jar

 

 Perfect for your kids or to add a little extra ambiance to your backyard or bedroom, these cool fire fly jars are ridiculously easy to make.

 

You just need a jar, diamond glitter, glow sticks, and some water. Granted, the glow sticks fade after awhile but you can enjoy them.

 

Use them as decorations for your next party.

 

Just follow the instructions in the picture.

I Want to be a Hobbit

 

So there for I want these slippers from ThinkGeek.

  

 

 

CUTE! it makes second dinner and second breakfast that much better!

Staying Friends with the Ex('s)

 

 

I had a messy break-up a few years ago and things ended poorly. One person was really hurt, the other was just confused and done. The hurt one lashed out in anger and the confused one took that anger as a threat and cut all ties-- no contact. And that was good. That gave time for the hurt one to come to terms with what had happened and that also gave time for the confused one to get things figured out.

 

and that was that. Until a few weeks ago when all of the sudden he popped back into my life. All has been forgiven and it's nice to know that we have both moved on. There is something special about being forgiven because I was the confused one in that scenario.

 

I have decent relationships with all my ex's. Well, I wouldn't exactly say "relationships" but I would say that I'm friendly with all of them. Should I ever run into one on the street I would never hesitate to go over with a friendly hug and say hi. That's just who I am, I shared something with that person and though I may have moved on I am still connected on some level to that person. Like an old friend. I don't see the purpose in hating an ex, especially over time. Both parties did the best they could and well, we've all learnt a lot now, haven't we.

 

It's undeniable, you can't be friends right away. That's hard. There are still too many emotions and sometimes leftover expectations. There has to be space. No contact. I always preach to my friend "90 days, no contact!" when they go through a break-up. You can deal with the after math much better when your emotions are in check. I'm not usually the kind of girl who gets in touch in the following months after a break-up. I need to get my head straight, especially when I've been the one broken-up with.

 

I guess in a way when I know I can be friendly with my ex's I know that all doors have been closed, we all have our closure and the relationship is finally done because I no longer have any emotional ties-- love or hate. Yes, I believe that's it for me. A friend of mine always challenges me and says that I just can't let go, but I disagree. I feel as though I have let go of all of my ex's but I hate that feeling of not being able to do something. That when I see something, I can't openly write and say "Hey, thought you'd enjoy this!" or what not. Is that wrong? I don't feel like it is, it doesn't cause me hurt or anxiety. I feel good about it. It's never affected my relationship, especially as I've grown more as a person and I'm able to feel confident in my choices.

 

 

What do you think? Are you friends with your ex's? Do you hate them? Or could you careless.

 

** post inspired by Cup of Jo

Easiest DIY ever. EVER.

 

Method and Tools:

White mug

Black Sharpie

oven.

 

that's it.

 

ta-DAA!

What Women Notice First

I saw this ad:

(it made me laugh)

and it states that men notice boobs first on women and women notice hair on men. The more I think about it the more I can't remember for the life of me what I notice first on a man. I don't think it's his hair or his shoes or what he smells like... attraction doesn't happen until I spend time with the guy.

When I see a man I think the first thing I notice is his mouth and his eyes (side note, I just created a spread sheet of all the boys I've dated and what they look like-- conclusion is I don't have a type unless "glasses" are a type). Then maybe his chin but none of that matters until I've talked to a guy, then I'm either head over heels and down for the count or over it.

and as for boobs, I might agree that most men would notice boobs first for a few reason:

a) they are boobs and they have magical properties

b) as women, we tend to showcase them a little because we are aware of the magical properties which make men notice them even more. It's all good, men are usually pretty good and checking things out without getting caught.

I'm not sure what the point of this post is, I just though the commercial was funny though somewhat general. The point was made that Axe now has shampoo and the type of man who would use it might also take pictures of Justin Beiber to their stylist to get a hair cut just like it.

Do you have any thoughts on this?

Values, Love and Relationship

I have come to understand over the last year how important values are in relationships of all types.Values, quite simply, are about what you believe you fundamentally need in order to live your life authentically and to be happy.

Your values are your own and whatever you’re prioritising in your life and swearing up and down that you need and can’t survive without, will tell you a lot about your mentality and your direction. Little do you realise that you may actually be taking yourself off course and busting your own boundaries in the process.

We have a tendency to do a few things that cause us to wind up in a lot of problems:


1) We get sidetracked by secondary values which are stuff like common interests, appearance and anything that is ‘nice to have’ but doesn’t really tell you a great deal about the person and when all is said and done, it won’t make a difference if primary ‘core’ values are not shared.

2) We make assumptions about what the existence of some values, qualities and characteristics mean and assume that other values that we desire are also present. I hear so many people say that they met someone who looked as they would like or was super intelligent or they had various common interests with, or they go to church / are the same religion and yet they don’t understand why they clash, have entirely different characters, or don’t want similar things. It’s like 2 + 2 + 1 = 100.

3) We ignore the vital feedback communicated from people’s actions and words and in fact tend to be blinded by our own values. “Well I do ______ and _____ and ______ is important to me so why aren’t they doing and being the same?”

Errrr because values are personal.

Your job isn’t to make someone have the same values as you; your job is to respect and live by your own values and find likeminded folk. We also persist in focusing on values that we think are important to us that are being met, yet completely ignore the fact that the problems we are experiencing are not only being caused by other values, but that they are also giving us feedback that communicates that we either don’t understand what’s important to us and are ignoring it to our detriment, or who we say we are and what we want is not true.

You have all sorts of values and together they are the sum of you.
You may never have truly given a great deal of thought to what these values are, but they are a mix of personal values (your character and personal code of ethics) along with stuff like economic, religious, sexual, religious, political, social, hobbies and interests, appearance etc. If you want to be happy in or out of a relationship, it’s time to heed your own values.

1. If you have some critical differences on the personal values front, it does not matter which other values you claim to share, your relationship isn’t going to work. A lot of people prioritise being in a relationship, companionship, getting laid etc, but I’ve yet to come across one person who is genuinely happy doing these things with someone who is for instance, a liar, cheat, abusive, and who doesn’t treat them with love, care, trust, and respect.

Personal values represent character and boundaries hence if you’re with someone whose character isn’t similar or at the very least compliments yours, you will bust your own boundaries by deviating greatly from your values while at the same time they will bust yours.

You will find that there are many differences that can be overcome when you respect the individuality of others as opposed to trying to make people be a clone of you and/or blaming yourself for why they’re not, however, boundary busting personal values is not one of them. And remember: If you go along with another person’s dodgy values, it is time to have an honest conversation with yourself about your own personal values.... Men who eye up underage girls, or who lie with the ease of drawing breath and yet they were still there. Come.On.Now.

2. Shared values engenders trust hence if you are experiencing trust issues, it’s an alarm alerting you to a difference in core values, likely on the personal values front, that’s behind the area of distrust. There’s either a very crucial difference in how you each conduct yourselves or there’s a very crucial difference in how you want to live or one, or both of you are trying to make the other take on the other person’s values.

Let me say it again – we trust people with whom we share core values. If you also want to understand why you keep getting into similar unhealthy relationships it’s because while you may profess certain values, you ‘trust’ in the feedback from that person possessing certain values that speak to your own pattern. Hence you may feel more trusting of someone who is shady and dodging a relationship, not because you’re truly ‘trusting’ them, but more because you trust that this relationship is ‘safe’, that you can seek validation, and that you can fulfil your self-fulfilling prophecy that speaks to your own beliefs about you, love, and relationships.

3. Look at what keeps coming back up and causing issues in a relationship – no matter what is being said, it tells you a hell of a lot about where there are incompatibilities with your values. This information will either tell you why your relationship isn’t going to work or is at the very least highlighting where you need to be focused. I’ve had so many people share stories (I've shared a lot of my own) about how they were with someone who was so attractive, sexy, shared common interests, kind to animals/children, mentioned back in 1983 that they might want to get married or that they’d like a relationship one day, they made them laugh and yada yada yada. This is all well and good but if this was what was the bread and butter of your relationship, you wouldn’t be experiencing major problems.

All this he said/she said and blowing smoke up people’s bums and pumping them up is a waste of your time because you’re looking at the wrong information. The net result of your relationship, the areas where you’re struggling – this is telling you where you don’t share values or where there’s certainly a miscommunication of them.

4. Be careful of the silent handshake in values. If you stick with someone who doesn’t share core values, they assume that you’re not serious about your own values and that you’re actually now sharing theirs. Of course you may be assuming the same thing. Do not ignore core differences that will take you away from being you and certainly don’t proceed on the assumption that they’re going to abandon their own. Love is not about having the power to change someone.

5. You are not looking for a clone of you. I know many couples who have different values but share core values where it counts. It means that it doesn’t matter what colour they are or religion or size or political party – when it comes down to how they each want to live their lives and how they want to treat one another, they are on the same page. Equally I know a lot of people who value certain things and so even if they had all of this in common, they wouldn’t be with someone who wasn’t the same religion, colour, political party etc. That’s their prerogative – these are their values to live by but never allow someone who is very rigid about these things to be with you (someone who doesn’t embody this value) and then use it as an excuse to mistreat you or not commit.


Moral of the story:
Someone may be great on illusionary paper, but it’s values that show who they are and whether your relationship can happen in reality.

THE END! xxoo

2012 Perseid Meteor Shower

 

 

Every year around this time, the Earth is pelted with fiery stones from the frigid depths of outer space. Instead of as being as terrifying as that concept has every right to be, it is beautiful and awe-inspiring. For skywatchers, this year’s Perseid meteor shower should be a particular treat, with Jupiter and Venus getting in on the action as well.

ProTips on how to view the coolest light show of the year and a video from the smart folks at NASA, who when they are not sending robots to perfect 10 landings on another planet, are apparently getting other people to do their more menial tasks — like counting meteors — for them. Nice work if you can get it, right?

Get Out of Dodge: If you can afford to take a little late-night trip and, yes, lose a little sleep, getting away from city lights is going to make the Perseids a much more enjoyable show. Escaping light pollution will make for a lot more visible meteors. I didn't see anything particular set up at the observatory SW of the city but it might be worth while checking it out anyway.

Sunday Funday: This Sunday, August 12th will mark the height of the show, which goes on every year when the Earth passes near the comet Swift-Tuttle.

Coffee. Also, More Coffee: Though you can catch a glimpse of the meteors pretty much anytime after 10 or 11 pm, the best viewing is going to be in the early morning hours, just before dawn. So be prepared to either get up real early, or stay up real late. Hot coco is also nice or some kind of tea. Just something warm to put in your tummy and don't forget some comfy blankets to lay out on. This is one thing that is best enjoyed on your back.

Look to the East. Also, A Little North: The majority of the evening’s shooting stars will seem to radiate from the constellation Perseus. For those of you who (like me) have no idea where to begin looking for that cluster of stars, it is to the northeast. For those of you who (again, like me) have no idea what direction northeast is, your phone probably has a compass that will come in handy.

For more tips, we turn you over to the capable hands and dulcet tones of the professionals at NASA. While you’re watching, the space agency would appreciate if you could count meteors for them to help determine the trajectory of Swift-Tuttle. They’ve even cooked up a smartphone app to make it easy for you — at that point, it’s kind of rude not to lend a hand, right? Right.

 

 

and for a special treat, watch this video!

and then check out this month's Star Chart from the TELUS Spark Science Centre.

(via Space.com, pic via Logan Brumm)